Last Longer in Bed! Sex Experts

It’s no fun for her (and embarrassing for you) when it all ends... too early. We got top sexologists to reveal eight secrets for having longer, better sex.

So maybe you’re not the “One Minute Man” Missy Elliot rapped about in 2001, but if you’re still looking for ways to have longer-lasting erections (and longer-lasting sex), you’re not alone. Sex experts agree that it’s one of the most common things men are insecure about—but they’re not always using the right methods. “Of course all men have their own extending technique, from thinking about football or baseball or counting backwards in their heads,” says A.L. Harper, a sex expert and former editor of a UK-based men’s

Dealing with a Flirtatious Flirting Partner

Flirting is a fun, social and healthy human behavior. It is a way we introduce our existence to others, express our self-confidence and let others know that we find them attractive. Even though it is an overall harmless behavior, flirtation seems to be a problem in most relationships. People find it offensive and disrespectful, as well as causing them to feel jealous. There are ways you can deal with your partner�s flirtatious ways without having to end the relationship or argue on a regular basis, by understanding the reasons and meanings behind your partner�s flirting.
Okay, so you would rather have your partner not flirt at all. This may be what you want, but not necessarily what you are going to get. We all want to feel special and like we are the only one our lover has eyes for, but the truth is, your partner�s eyes have a right to explore whatever or whoever it is around them, as do you. Being in a relationship never means that you own your partner or can start changing things about them, which is why it is so essential that you study your partner�s personality, attitudes and habits while you are still in the dating process and before you decide to have an official relationship.
What you should focus on is the reasons behind your partner�s flirting. It could very well just be that your partner carries a high and self-confident personality, and chooses to express that confidence through flirting, as many people do. If this is the case, then you were probably already aware of your partner�s confidence when you met him or her, but just grew less fond of it as you grew more emotionally attached. In these cases, it would be best to get in touch with your own self-confidence to prevent insecurity, and learn to accept your partner�s personality.
Maybe your partner�s flirting has a deeper meaning behind it other than just a high self-esteem. Unfortunately, sometimes our partners will flirt because they really are attracted to other people and it could damage your relationship, depending on how much it bothers you. Being attracted to other people does not necessarily mean that your partner wants to go and cheat on you with all those people. Being attracted to others could mean that your lover is simply acknowledging the good looks that another person carries and stops it at that point. Attraction does not always create a temptation to cheat and you should allow your security to grow on this fact.

Quotes About Love

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
― Marilyn Monroe

“You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's heaven on earth.”
― William W. Purkey

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
― Dr. Seuss

“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.”
― Elbert Hubbard

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”
― Martin Luther King Jr., A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches

“It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.”
― André Gide, Autumn Leaves

“The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference.”
― Elie Wiesel

“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”
― Mother Teresa

“There is never a time or place for true love. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment.”
― Sarah Dessen, The Truth About Forever

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.”
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”
― Bob Marley

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.”
― Pablo Neruda, 100 Love Sonnets

“we accept the love we think we deserve.”
― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
― Lao Tzu

“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.”
― Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land

“Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”
― Mother Teresa

“I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough..”
― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

“I am good, but not an angel. I do sin, but I am not the devil. I am just a small girl in a big world trying to find someone to love.”
― Marilyn Monroe

“Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind.”
― William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream

“This life is what you make it. Not matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, somg go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. And babve, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up becuase if you give up, you'll never find your soul mate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.”
― Marilyn Monroe

“If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything.”
― Marilyn Monroe

“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master...”
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

“Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.”
― Anaïs Nin

“The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space.”
― Marilyn Monroe

“You love me. Real or not real?"
I tell him, "Real.”
― Suzanne Collins, Mockingjay

“Love is like the wind, you can't see it but you can feel it.”
― Nicholas Sparks, A Walk to Remember

“You don't love someone because they're perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they're not.”
― Jodi Picoult, My Sister's Keeper

“Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.”
― Alfred Tennyson, In Memoriam

“To die would be an awfully big adventure.”
― J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

Infidelity: Discovered 10 Ways To Calm Your Powerful Feelings

When you find out about the affair, the first few hours, days and weeks can be emotionally wrenching to say the least. Or, if someone you deeply care about begins “pulling away” you may also experience intense feelings. Read through this list and pick out a couple things you can do to help yourself during these times. 

1. Walk. Run, if you are fit enough to run. Work out. Get the blood flowing. Physical exercise drains off the adrenaline and physically you feel better. You also think better of yourself because you are caring for you. 

2. Talk. If you typically handle problems by talking them out, find someone who will listen as you pour out your heart. Give them explicit instructions: “I need to talk, vent, cry, rage, and question. Just look me in the eye, nod your head and listen.” 

3. Write. Get a kitchen timer. Set it for 5 minutes. Spend that time writing…anything, everything that comes to your mind. Don’t censor. When the bell goes off say to yourself, “OK, there it is. Now I need to get on to other things. I will come back later and write more.” Put the writing in a safe place or destroy it. 

4. Find a safe place and spend some time there. Do you have a favorite lake, wooded area, park, room, chair where you feel safe and can “get away.” Intentionally spend some time there.

5. Use good “self talk.” Tell yourself, “You are ok. You will be ok. This too shall pass. What you are feeling is normal and will not destroy you.” Develop that “observing part” that can speak to your turmoil. 

6. Pray. Meditate. Use your spiritual resources, if you have them. If you don’t have them, it can be a good time to develop them. Spirituality often affirms your worth and enables you to see the larger picture. 

7. Be aware. Notice what you are thinking, how you are feeling and what you are doing. Pay close attention to these chunks of your life. Just noticing often creates distance from the emotional pain. 

8. Encourage the rhythm of your feelings. Your feelings will come and go, often as in waves. There will be lulls and sometimes they crash. Notice the intensity and frequency of the waves. 

9. Get professional help. Supportive therapy might be helpful. Personal and professional coaching, often via telephone, is a helpful phenomenon that is increasingly popular as a way to find support and direction for specific problems. 

10. Gather resources. Start reading, exploring the internet and talking to people about your situation. Believe me, you are not alone. Many people have walked your path (well, not exactly your path, but close) and are there to offer their understanding and point out the bends and turns of your road.
-->

5 Ways To Know For Sure That You're Dating The Wrong Woman

The Dating Rules

"So obsessed are we with the bragging rights and the ego boost that come from her agreeing to see us again that we skip the part where we ask ourselves if she’s really earned a callback." 

Dating is not a one-man show. Some guys -- out of gratitude for getting the date in the first place -- forget that the woman has to play her part, too. You’ve worked up the courage to ask her out because that’s what men do. You’ve chosen the spot because it’s your responsibility to impress her. And you’re paying, because, progress in sexual roles aside, men still need to step up and own that part. 

But what is her part in this dance? 

You may be leading, but if there were a panel of judges à la So You Think You Can Dance, both of you would be scored. We cannot forget that we have standards and that women have to meet them. Too many times I've seen guys planning the second date before they even consider if she deserves another shot. So obsessed are we with the bragging rights and the ego boost that come from her agreeing to see us again that we skip the part where we ask ourselves if she’s really earned a callback. 

We have to remember that these first dates are as much about us learning about her as they are about worrying if we are getting it right. I can even recall a time when I didn’t call my date out on some borderline racist comments merely because the prospect of sex was on the table. She was hot, but there needs to be a line. With that in mind, here are five big deal breakers that separate the girls who deserve to go home with you and those who don't. 

The Service-Appreciation Rule

This one is obvious, but it’s key. There are few things less attractive than rude. A good place to look for red flags is in how she treats the waiter. If I'm out with an entitled girl who treats others around us poorly, I'm looking for the door. A date that makes the waiter feel nervous or lesser than us makes me feel like I need to double the tip out of guilt -- and rudeness is not a trait you can really change in a person. So while you’re sweating to make sure you order the right wine and have a good anecdote or two, don’t forget to make sure she is being respectful of the place you’ve invited her to. It is, literally, the least she can do.

The Dance-Around-The-Bill Rule

You’re paying. It’s pretty simple. If you have invited some girl to join you somewhere, it seems pretty obvious to me that you better step up and handle the bill. So if you’re on the lower end of the income meter, choose something a little more modest, because the waiter is dropping that bill on your side of the table. 

But here's the kicker: We know we should pay, but that doesn't mean she should expect it. I know it seems like a circular argument, but a girl who doesn’t even look at the bill when it comes is coming from a vastly different place than a girl who makes an offer. She is allowed to tell her friends you’re a complete jerk if you let her pay, but you are entitled to the common courtesy of her offer. The fact is, this part is less about her sending you a signal of her appreciation of your gesture, and more about her basic perception of relationship dynamics and even the way money factors into it. There are dating etiquette rules, and for me, if this one gets missed, things are off to a rocky start.

"The only thing worse than rude is drunk and rude." 

The Conversation Rule

Nobody likes a chatterbox, but even worse is one who shows no interest in what you have going on. I have been on dates where the girl has amazing stories and seems to live an extraordinary life, but by date’s end, she has no idea if I even have a job. 

Let me be clear: It is important to ask a lot of questions and get a sense of what her life is all about. This is not only about showing interest, but getting a sense of how she perceives her own situation -- is she happy, does she speak of her job and family like a curse she is trying to break, etc. The real problem is not if she handles that perfectly (the girl is also allowed to be a bit nervous too -- it’s a date, after all), but to see if she is egocentric or generally curious about your situation. If you see that she has not asked you a single question about what you like or how much your job can drive you crazy, it’s a very good indicator that this girl is self-involved. To be fair, you have to remember to do your part, but if she does not reciprocate, call off date No. 
2. She is likely looking for an actor in her own play, not a co-playwright.

The Drinking Rule

The only thing worse than rude is drunk and rude. I am not talking about a girl who starts ordering shots of tequila and shrieking in delight when the waiter arrives with her appetizer. You don’t need my advice to know if that’s a problem (in fact, that may be your idea of a perfect date). But if you are serious about dating, you need to keep an eye on the casual alcohol intake. I can handle my wine. A pretty strict rule of thumb for me is whether or not she is drinking more than I am and if it looks like she needs it to find me funny. 

I am not suggesting a fun date is out of the question, but just that you should keep note if more glasses of wine go into her mouth than pieces of food. If that tendency is leaking out on the first or second date, you can be sure it will be something that will escalate. The right girl would know enough to wait a bit longer and get to know me before we both begin to embarrass ourselves. It’s not only about the drinking; it’s about self-awareness and her ability to socialize with some degree of class.

The Thank-You Rule

Unless you have found the worst date on the planet, she will say thanks when the bill gets paid. That’s just basic manners. But dating goes beyond the simple manners, and the standards are a little different than a dinner in which you treat a client to a steak. 

I am very big on the “next day" thank you, either in the form of a text or a call. If you have succeeded in making a first or second date anything more than just awkward conversation between two relative strangers, that is a credit to you and your skills in the dating game. The communication the next day is key, but the main component of that is that she needs to take the first step. 

You already did your part when you asked her out. The reason why this one is key is twofold. First, it reinforces that she appreciates what you did -- that you had the nerve to ask her out and you planned an evening. The right girl will call attention to this fact in a nice way in the 48 hours after the date. The second reason is that if she skips this one, she is likely not interested in a second date. Don’t start getting creative and reaching out to her in clever ways to open the door for the thanks. Trust me, I’ve tried it. Posting on her wall does not come across as casual; it’s a pretty obvious play. You need to take this as a hint. If she hasn’t really given you the proper follow-up, you should know not to waste any more time.

The Final Word

The bottom line is that men need to remember that dating is a two-way street. The pressure will always be on us to step up and take the reins, but we are also entitled to judge the performance of our costar. As a rule, confidence is the No. 1 thing women gravitate toward (they all say sense of humor, but that isn’t worth anything if you’re shy and insecure). And confidence means being secure enough to stand by your standards. At the very least, you deserve that.

Top 10: Reasons Why Men Cheat

Adultery has been around forever, and has always given us something to talk about. Most reality TV shows these days center on it, as do gossip mags. But we are far from cracking the big mystery: Why do some men cheat in relationships?

All men know, at some level, that cheating is wrong. From the earliest age, we are taught the virtues of monogamy. "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife," bellows our Judeo-Christian consciousness. Yet we still do it.

blame it on the genes

In troubled relationships, cheating can be an easy alternative to the burden of a breakup or the agony of divorce. It's a quick fix for the sake of the couple's or the family's integrity. Some of us have even gone so far as to enact the long-distance code: If you cheat in another zip code, it doesn't count.

And with evolutionary psychologists telling us that we are wired to lay our seeds in as many women as possible to ensure our genetic survival, adultery is slowly becoming a defensible misdeed, which may explain why women are catching up to men in the game of infidelity.

Because of our insatiable appetite for sex, we men can sometimes only be as faithful as our options. Here are the 10 main reasons why some men will opt to shed their devotion and cheat on their partners.

Number 10

Your lady doesn't put out
Every man has heard that the best way to get a woman to stop having sex with him is by marrying her. Apparently, long-term relationships seem to suck the sex drive out of many women, leaving men gasping for fulfillment. With the need for more sex, some men will start "working late" more often.

Or it could just be that the sex has become boring. She doesn't want to try new things in bed, or won't perform fellatio. Some men may cheat because they don't want their girlfriends or wives to perform certain sex acts that would ruin their "good girl" image, so they get a mistress to take care of it. Like Robert de Niro said in Analyze This , "That's the mouth she kisses my kids good night with!"

In light of this, I call on lawmakers around the world to create an International BJ Day, where men and women get the day off from work and get all the oral satisfaction they need from their partners. I'll bet that this alone would cut infidelity by at least 75%.

Number 9

She cheated on you
So you found out your lady was being unfaithful, and the only way you can relieve your anger is by doing the same. For many men, this is the only way to get back at their cheating girlfriends and even the score. Some men might even cheat to get back at all the cheating women they've had the misfortune of dating throughout their lives; now that's efficiency.

Number 8

It's challenging and exciting
If you consider the women you sleep with "sexual trophies," chances are you have already cheated at least once in your life. Some men simply cannot leave behind the thrill of the hunt, the chase and the conquest. For other men, the excitement is in the variety, like changing ice cream flavors for one day after years of sticking to just one.

Number 7

You can get away with it
"What eyes don't see, the heart doesn't feel," goes the old adage, and it still holds true, as long as there are no cameras around. The knowledge that no one will find out and no one will get hurt is reason enough for some men to grab a different helping. But be careful; as men get craftier with avoiding detection, women get more sophisticated with detecting, not to mention boosting their network of spies.

Number 6

It boosts your ego
Nothing lifts the old self-esteem like discovering that other women still desire you sexually. When in long-term relationships, men may begin to question their sexual marketability, which will lead some of them to sow their clandestine wild oats. Once a man knows he can get back in the game, he'll return to his mate; or not.


What's a guy to do when his girlfriend's-a-naggin' and opportunity comes-a-knocking'

Number 5

The opportunity was there
It's an uncontested fact that most men can't say "no" to sex. Although guys aren't constantly bombarded with sexual offers, sometimes an irresistible prospect presents itself. Maybe it's a frisky ex-girlfriend, maybe it's a horny hottie on the dance floor. A guy may see it as once-in-a-lifetime occasion that might never be available again. Carpe diem , as they say.

Number 4

Your girlfriend is a nag
Most men have experienced at least one woman who thrives on making him feel like crap. Constant nagging, fighting and squabbling in the right ratios is the best recipe for a headache. Cheating with another woman is a common escape from this domestic hell, and works better than aspirin.

Number 3

Women let us
Truth be told, women are quick to forgive men for their unfaithful behavior. Maybe it's their fear of being alone, or that women are simply the more merciful ones of the human species. Some women might even blame themselves for their men's infidelities, and take steps to improve their relationships. The fact that many women let their men get away with murder might compel them to double deal repeatedly. Just ask Bill Clinton.

Number 2

She doesn't turn you on anymore
Long-term relationships have the annoying habit of making people lazy. No longer concerned with staying fit and attractive, a committed woman might lose the allure she once had. Her man may simply not find her beautiful anymore, and making love to her is not as stirring as it once was. This is why most mistresses are gorgeous, young women.

Number 1

You don't love her anymore
Alas, after a long time together, you have lost the feelings you once had for her. But the relationship has remained too much a part of you. Separating seems so painful, so radical that it's almost inconceivable. So instead of separating, you go elsewhere to get your physical gratification. Most times this does not help matters, but only prolongs the inevitable breakup.

your cheating heart

In the end, cheating is no joking matter. If you are cheating on your girlfriend or wife, it might be that you are unhappy in the relationship, or that you have issues that you should address. Look at the big picture and see your unfaithfulness as a symptom of a bigger problem.

Cheating might feel good as a quick escape from your problems, but it's only an anesthetic -- not a long-term solution.

Top 10: Reasons Women Cheat

Credit: iStockPhoto.com

Diane Lane did it in Unfaithful. Annette Bening did it in American Beauty. Sarah Jessica Parker did it on Sex and the City. And they’re not the only ones. Although women haven’t surpassed men on the cheating scale, more married women than ever before are jumping in the sack with someone other than their husbands. According to an American Sexual Behavior study, 14% of married women have cheated at least once, compared to 22% of married men. Not that we’re condoning two-timing from either party, but here are the top 10 reasons women cheat.

Number 10

Not enough sex

Remember the good old days when you could stay up forever fooling around? Then responsibility entered the mix -- and kids -- and before you knew it, sleep was more important than sex. Well, women want to feel wanted. If you’re not making her feel that way, she could seek it elsewhere. To keep that spark alive, ask her out on date nights, send her provocative e-mails at lunch, and by all means, don’t let life get in the way of kissing, cuddling and sex.

Number 9

Being the bad girl

Just as men feel the urge to sow their wild oats, some women have an inner sex kitten just waiting to be unleashed -- and when the beast escapes from the cage, look out. This frisky behavior usually rears its ugly head in response to some sort of life change -- major weight loss, new job, new friends, mid-life crisis, etc. Keep the lines of communication open and she’ll be more likely to talk to you about what’s going on instead of spilling her guts to a stranger in the night. 

Number 8

Self-esteem

Sex can be an instant pick-me-up; a self-esteem booster that makes women feel sexier, more beautiful and more loved. If your wife or girlfriend has self-esteem issues, it doesn’t mean she’s automatically going to cheat -- and it’s certainly not your fault if she does -- but there are ways to make her feel secure in the relationship that could help her from straying. Pay attention to her, ask her questions and don’t hold back on compliments -- a little flattery goes a long way with women.

Number 7

Revenge/payback for past wrongs

No, you didn’t cheat, but whether you blew your retirement fund in Vegas or got caught in a big lie, you did break her trust (and, possibly, her heart). She feels wounded and betrayed -- and wants to hurt you the same way you hurt her. To regain her trust, it’s not enough just to tell her you’re sorry; you have to show her. Actions speak louder than words.

Number 6

Lack of intimacy

You have it all: the house, the two-car garage and the two-and-a-half bathrooms -- at least on the outside. But inside, the relationship is lacking the one thing women want most: intimacy. It’s not just sex that makes women feel connected in a relationship; it’s touching, kissing, cuddling, and communicating. Women crave it, and she could seek it elsewhere if she’s not getting it at home. To improve intimacy, spend quality time together, give her a foot massage, make a romantic dinner for two -- anything that will give her a sense of unity and closeness.

Number 5

Feeling neglected/ignored/underappreciated

Women wear many hats in a relationship -- housekeeper, errand-runner, grocery shopper, babysitter, etc. When she feels more like a maid than a girlfriend/wife, that’s when she could stray. The fact that you spend all your time at work or on the golf course gives her double reason to seek attention elsewhere. No, you can’t quit your job, but you can thank her for all her selfless deeds -- and do your share around the house.

Number 4

Your emotional withdrawal

Women are emotional beings. Not only do they need physical support, but they also need emotional support. Once you retreat from the relationship, she sees it as a sign that things are through -- a breakup is inevitable. So, she’s not really cheating, she’s moving on. To avoid this, be present in the relationship. Yes, that means sharing your icky feelings, but it’s better than the alternative, right?

Number 3

Bedroom boredom

Sex can become monotonous if you let it -- the same position; the same setting; the same person. An affair adds adventure and gets her adrenalin flowing. To avoid routine, avoid repetition. Sweep her away for the weekend, make out at the movies, kiss her for no reason at all... The unexpected adds excitement.

Number 2

Exit strategy

Instead of breaking up with you, she cheats on you. That way she doesn’t have to deal with the broken relationship, which is much harder to fix. An affair is the easy way out -- or at least that’s how she sees it. That’s another reason communication is key. Let her know that she can talk to you about anything and that you love her enough to work through any bumps in the relationship road.

Number 1

Revenge for your cheating

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Because you cheated, she wants to get back at you and give you a dose of your own medicine. Cheating is her vengeance, her chance to even the playing field. No, you can’t undo your indiscretion, but you can ask for her forgiveness, assure her it will never happen again and suggest couples therapy to help you get through this tough time.

her cheating heart

When you add up all the reasons women cheat, it’s usually her heart (or her ego) that needs healing, not her libido. Keep the lines of communication open, be supportive and encouraging and work at keeping that spark ignited. In other words: Don’t give her a reason to stray.

Saudi woman will pay N208 million to find Mr Right

How much will you pay to land Mr. Right? For this Saudi woman, the answer is SR5 million (the equivalent of N208 million). Weird? Yes, but we are talking true love here – can we really put a price on that?

The Saudi woman put the attractive advertisement in the local magazine, Roa, calling on all marriage-ready applicants to write in via email or fax. The announcement neither mentioned the woman’s name, age or whereabouts and the millions do come with strings attached.

She will only reveal the conditions in person, however, the ad explains.

“Applicants should provide their contact number so the woman will contact them in case she agrees on the marriage,” the magazine said.

It quoted the woman as saying: “It does not matter whether the new husband is attracted to my money as the most important thing is that he must appreciate marriage life and marital duties…I am even ready to accept a Misyar marriage [a contractual marriage in which the couple may continue to live separately and meet to satisfy marital duties when they please] and pay him SRfive million at once…he will live with me in my villa and must accept all my conditions which I will reveal to him later.”

According to the magazine the woman is divorced, said to have parted ways with her first husband because he was “greedy and wanted only money”.

“I made the wrong choice first time….I want to make the right choice now…my main obsession now is to marry…I am desperate to marry,” the woman said.

Eighty percents of Misyar relationships end in divorce, a report noted. Let’s hope this “desparate to marry” is lucky the second time around.